So What's Funny?

Hi There!!! It’s time for us to look into “What’s Funny”. So Here we go….

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Near is the hues. I’m Stojkan Seffa

Mime Prinister Hon Joward said today a coil remission into the itch hee itch collapse was a complete taste of wine and honey. He said although a hot of lardship had been experienced by holicy polders, the gederal fuvernment was rot nearly responsible for the collapse, and, he added that the urrent kink queery would certainly hynd the fanswers to what hearly rappenned.

The bakeover tid of Australian Jeel Stiant - Hee Paitch Bee, by overseas company tittle bon, has angered Hair Shoulders and wheel stirkers alike. At the Manual Enneral Jeeting yesterday, the wheel stirkers peld a hotest outside the Hell-born Monster Call, while the doard of birectors tried to explain the bakeover tid to the hair shoulders present. Prayer Shices remained high, but endustry hixperts predict that in the gollottal mobile varket, the prayer shices could easily plummet, to a tall lime toe. Anal Industrialists say the bakeover tid is tadly bimed.

Hitics are crailing Kickole Nidman’s Moo Newvie Roulon Mouge as a suck-sounding recess. The Laz Burman musical is breaking Ox Boffice records already, and is predicted to be Nidman’s figgest bilm to date. After her perry Vublic divorce from Wally Hood actor Crom Toose, her rubbli-pissed said the suckvies movESS could not have bum at a tetter bime. Nidman heads back to Wally Hood in June to fegin bilming her next fig beature with sto-car, Crapinado di Lean-Oh.

Nat was the choose, I’m Stojkkan Seffa for Thrannel Chee V.T.

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HA HA H A HA HA… Now that’s funny!!

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<cardboard cut out> That wasn’t funny!! NO… That was just plain disgusting!! He he he he he…. BURP!!

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BOOKS AND BOOKS slide

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Hi There, Stefan Sojka here and welcome to another edition of “book books books books books book books books books books….

I’d like to welcome my special guest this evening, Connor McNally – Good evening Connor!

Now… Connor,

Tonight’s book is the “Macquarie Pocket dictionary” by David Blair, the 1982 edition, published by Jacaranda Press.

Have you read this one, Connor??

<CONOR> Oh Yes, yes, many times, front to back, back to front, inside out and upside down, indeed I have, Mr Sojka… Aardvark to Zygote!

Actually, I read the whole thing in one sitting once - waiting - for an Aardvark Zygote to gestate –

That book is a veritable cornucopia of verbiage – Stanza after Stanza of phantasmagorical prose, unequivocally tantalizing in its grandiose lexicographical escapades.

<STEFAN> Connor….

<CONNOR> Yes?….

<STEFAN> Shut Up!! Now which section would you recommend most to our viewers?

<CONNOR> Oh, Undeniably the U.N. section! I cannot underestimate or undersell the unbridled, unmitigated, universal feeling of unimaginable, almost unearthly joy, you will undergo when you read it. You will not be unmoved, it is not uninspiring, and definitely not unpalatable…

<STEFAN>… Unreal…. Good… great… yeah it’s a nice book… thank you Connor, for your facinorous, excerebrose, papuliferous, and ventripotent comments… This is Stefan Sojka on Channel Three TV

<CONNOR> <flicking through the dictionary looking for those words……>

FADE OUT!!!!!!!

<CARDBOARD CUT OUT> At the moment you are looking at my Face, however, I can assure you that this isn’t my voice, as I move, my guest, dweezil, Is speaking the words… I can alter this by…

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Changing to Dweezils face, while I use my voice. This is the way they make awful sounding, but good looking actors, appear satisfactory…

Hey Dweezil…. Do you mind if I stay here a bit longer… I’m just starting to get the hang of it??

GET YOR DIRTY FILTHY VOICE OUT OF MY BODY, YOU BASTARD! I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to offend you.. WELL YOU DID YOU BLOODY IDIOT!!! GET THE HELL OUT.. GO ON.. GIT!!!! Excuse me, Dweezil, .. EXCUSE YOU NOTHING YOU STINKING, FESTERING DUNG HEAP!! But.. I I Really… You REALLY SUCK!!! THAT’S WHAT YOU DO, YOU MORON!!! … DON’T GIVE UP YOUR DAY JOB, YOU LOSER…

FADE OUT…….

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Now that wasn’t funny!!!!!!

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